My last week has been pretty crazy, what with doctor's visits, bouncing checks, and a kitty's trip to heaven. Needless to say, I am more than ready to divulge all of my week's insanity. And, if it doesn't make me feel better, at least it will provide a little comic relief.
On to Not Me! Monday for June 8 . . .
It was not me that had to run after El twenty seven times last Tuesday at E's tee-ball game. I would have realized that a spirited 19 month old and a baseball field do not mix. I would have also realized that upon seeing E man 2nd base and then wave, El would have immediately started screeching "Da-den! Da -den!" and then she would have ran for her dear brother Ethan (Da-den). Apparently, I would have figured out that El is a budding baseball player as she hugged the bag and threw a tantrum in front of two teams and their parents.
It also couldn't have been me that sprinted out to rescue E from hurricane El, and in the midst of my sprint, peed my pants a little bit. That would never happen to me! I would still have a bladder of steel even after three 50 pound pregnancy weight gains and delivering several 9 pound babies.
I am also still not wearing a safety pinned bra.
It was also not me that felt very thankful for graduation parties yesterday. I would have felt thankful and proud of the graduate's accomplishments instead of lucky that the family scored a free bbq meal that I did not have to cook. That would have been very ungrateful of me! So clearly, it was not me!
And when dear Sammy went to heaven, and hubby and I were calming down after blubbering over him for many minutes, it was not me that laughed hysterically when hubby remarked with a bit of relief, "At least I don't have to clean up cat litter anymore!" I would have respected Sammy's untimely death and remained composed instead of hooting and hollering with laughs.
I also would not have lost control of my bladder, again, while laughing.
And if I did, I would not have laughed harder, thereby subsequently leaking more pee.
Silly! Who leaks pee as an adult? Obviously, not me.
I couldn't afford another person in diapers.