Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Tales of A Girl Scout Drop Out

My daughter is a Girl Scout this year. 

There are multiple problems with this.

First, I am a Girl Scout drop out.  I quit the girl scouts in the 4th grade when I realized that the boys were camping in tents, and we girls had to use cabins.  I was filled with injustice!  (Apparently I was a little feminist in the making.)  Today,  I would take a cabin EVERY TIME.

Secondly, I have already "forgotten" to pick her up after her girl scouts' meeting.  I thought hubs was getting her.  He thought I was.  There sat Abs.  Not a good day in the mommy chronicles, I tell you.  Not. A. Good. Day.

And finally, the last and worst problem with Ab being a Girl Scout are these.


Ab is selling Girl Scout Cookies.

Heaven help me . . . and my thighs.

In honor of this momentous occasion . . . I give you this repost from last year's girl scout season, when the devil itself did not reside within my own house.


Dear Girl Scout,

I have you figured out!

You dress in your adorable uniform, you approach me with your smiling toothless grin, and you know.

You know.

Yes, you know very well that I will be unable to resist your little girl charms. I will inevitably buy a box or seven, just because you are cute. Forget about the fact that the Thin Mints are delish, and the Samoas taste di-vine crumbled up on vanilla ice cream. When you approach me with that box of cookies, and ask for my help, I will be transported back to when I was a girl scout (before I quit because they wouldn't let me tent camp like the boys). I will remember how hard it was for me to approach an adult and hock my baked goods. And when that memory comes rushing back, I am a goner.

And you know it.

You can smell the sale like a dog can smell fear.

I am but a victim in your entrepreneurial endeavors, and frankly, I may as well just set up a direct deposit into your cookie bank account.

I am that much of a lock.

So, please forgive me if I advert my eyes from your eager gaze. And, please don't take offense when I close the curtains and hide in the dark as you ring my bell. I am doing it for my own good.

And while you may not thank me for it, my ass will.

A drop out scout,



  1. I both dread and secretly love Girl Scout cookie time.

  2. Okay, you are just a really fun ball of energy and laughter. I've enjoyed my visit after finding you on SITS. Look at that little darling with her head up smiling...!!! And a sharpie on gray hairs! Why didn't I think of that!

  3. Oh those cookies... they are laced with crack you know. That is why they are so addicting. ;)

  4. Ha!!!! I just added one more thing to my list of 'good things about living in a transitional neighborhood'. NO GIRL SCOUTS!!!!

  5. Haha. ONe of my co-workers has 2 girls selling those cookies. I bought a case, thinking I had bought more than last year. Nope...I apparently blocked out the second case. Who needs that many cookies!!!?????

  6. LOL Thin Mints and Samoas are my weakness too. I also have to have a box of Tagalongs. They are too stinkin cute to say no.

    Another GS Drop Out here. Stopped in 6th grade because those little girls were just to mean!

  7. Your letter was so funny! I can never say no when I pass those little girls outside the supermarket selling their cookies (not to mention I also buy them from our neighbor)! Heaven help us when my daughters are old enough to join Girl Scouts!

  8. Annie, my hubby & I were just talking about the evil ways of Girl Scout cookies. Who exactly was their marketing repr.anyway? Why on earth would they kick off selling season in January when everyone is looking to shrink their butts?
    You have inspired me to write a post about this. Thanks for the visit today from SITS. Have a great one!!

  9. I LOVE girl scout cookies!!! yummmmy! Visiting from SITS today =)

  10. um, we polished off several boxes of Girl Scout cookies recently...YUM! thank goodness they are not around more often.

  11. I was kicked out of Brownies in the 3rd grade for convincing all the girls to throw their shoes up into trees...go figure...never been much of a 'joiner' anyway...


I love, love, love to read your comments!


Image: istock photo, Design by Bloggy Blog Designz Copyright © 2010