Have you ever had one of those moments where you think to yourself, "This can't be happening to me?"
No?
Then, you should probably quit reading. You are perfect, and I probably hate you. (Not really, but, you know, hate is like a little bit of sugar. It just helps you swallow things that much easier.)
And really, after today's moment, I will probably need a truck full of sugar to step foot in the gym again.
You see, after arriving at the gym and depositing El at the playroom, I made my way to the cubbies to remove all of my extra clothes I was wearing. (Of course, all of these extra clothes would be completely unnecessary if Jack Frost would just die, but that is another post entirely.) First, I stripped off my hat and gloves. Then, I peeled off my husband's comfy sweatshirt leaving me in my favorite teal workout tee. Finally, I pulled my warm ups down and off haphazardly yanking them over my tennies. It was then that I first noticed the draft on my legs.
And, instantly, my heart stopped and my face turned a lovely shade of crimson.
Not only had I pulled off my warmups, but in my haste to get to my workout, I had also pulled off my workout shorts in the process.
Yes.
I was standing in the middle of the gym with a cute workout tee, tennies, and my exposed panties for all the world to see.
My first thought?
At least I do not have on my granny panties! Whew!!
And the second?
How many people are witnessing this right now?
As it turns out, while I was hurriedly putting my shorts back on, I darted my eyes around the facility and noticed that 1) It was quite empty, and 2) No one seemed to notice that I had, in fact, mooned the patrons with my black panties.
Although, I am not sure of this fact in the least. It is possible that I may be on some employee bulletin board later this week, but, I digress.
The worst part about this is that ( and I am embarrassed to actually write this down), this is not the first time that I have de-pantsed myself in public.
I know. I know.
You think that I would have learned to be a bit more careful.
Although, the last time that it happened, I am absolutely positive that there were witnesses to my mortification.
How, you ask?
The last time that I pulled my warm ups off, complete with my shorts too, I was up in front of the gym classroom, teaching the step aerobics class.
Try to live that one down!
Thank God I was wearing clean undies . . . both times!
****I'd like to include this in Travis' Memoir Monday! He is one funny, fishing guy!
Monday, March 1, 2010
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So. I guess this means that I should give the pictures I took back?
ReplyDeleteI mean... I thought it was consensual.
Damn.
Thanks for joining, rookie! Glad to have you!
Shhhh, I'll tell you a secret.
ReplyDeleteI don't wear undies when I work out. ANd like you, sometimes I have to wear lots of layers over my workout capri pants...I am VERY careful, but I dread the day I moon everyone.
I don't like panty lines under my lycra work out capris and thongs are uncomfortable (in general, but esp. during vigorous aerobic activity). So I go commando. Is that awful or what?
but SHHHHH! it's a SECRET.
that's so funny! the step aerobics class... even funnier!
ReplyDeleteThank God! I thought I was the only one who does embarrassing things!
ReplyDeleteRe: the step aerobics class - Classic case of "Do as I SAY, not as I DO!"
LOL! You need to start wearing shorts under your shorts!
ReplyDeleteThat is just one of the reasons I always change in the locker room.
ReplyDeleteI do it all the time. No shame.
ReplyDeleteLast week I wore my shirt inside out all day and no one said anything.
I thought for sure you were going to say you had bare cheeks hanging out! See, it can always be worse! LOL
ReplyDeletei wear giant underwear everywhere and i am sure 100% of the time they are hanging out of the top of my jeans and i don't give a chit. ever. if we can't poke fun of ourselves, who can we?
ReplyDeleteI'll confess I don't wear undies either when I work out. Maybe that is why I just make sure I don't have to strip anything off when I go to the gym. Because I can guarantee you that if I did have to take something off I would end up having a moment like you.
ReplyDeleteIt ain't moonin' if you still have your (oh-so-sexy black non-granny) panties on, m'dear. Trust me on this!
ReplyDeleteThat is something I would totally do, except you are much more lucky than I am, because when I go to the gym, I skip on underwear for the comfort factor... EEK! Can you imagine? LOL
ReplyDeleteStoppin' by from SITS!
I am sitting here laughing my ass off...that is hysterical...
ReplyDeleteAt least you weren't COMMANDO!
ReplyDeleteI knew there was a special reason I liked you -- you make me feel so much better about myself and my own public humiliation. And, you weren't wearing orthopedic panties, so that was a good thing. Hee hee. You've made my day.
ReplyDelete