Monday, December 13, 2010

How to Write a "Real" Christmas letter or The Anti-Christmas letter 2010 edition

Dear Friends and Family,

2010 has been a year of blessings (and insanity) for our crazy clan.  With a 3 year old, a 6 year old, and a 9 year old, our life is never boring.

Ummmm, let's see . . . the highlights . . .

Ellerie, our enchanting 3 year old, is a study in contrasts.  When her eyes twinkle, you know that her devilish self is about to emerge, but when she flashes her disarming smile,  she knows that she can do no wrong.  She is still our budding artist. Lately, her favorite medium is chalk and . . . permanent markers.  Considering that her favorite canvas is herself, we are thinking that performance art is in her future. And, when Ellerie was recently caught autographing her basement wall masterpiece, she remarked, "Crap and dammit!"  Clearly as a performance artist she will be able to employ both her artistic creativity as well as her newly found language skills.  We are so proud.

Ethan, a budding kindergartner, is still as literal as ever.  In fact, he discovered that he had a new girlfriend on the bus this year when the girl told him,  "You are my boyfriend.  I am your girlfriend."  Ethan's comment?  "Well, she is a girl and she is my friend . . . so I guess she IS my girlfriend. "  Genius, no?  He is also very observant.  He has pointed out that my skin is getting wrinkly and that my husband's hair is getting grayer and grayer.  The boy also noticed the fact that not all moms yell, like his own. He has such keen observation skills!  These skills are probably what enabled him to be such a fantastic water boy at Paul's football games this year.  I mean, knowing exactly when a football player can use a drink of water is clearly a tough job, but he excelled at it.  We are so proud of our little Adam Sandler wannabe.

Abbie continues to be the resident fashionista of our household.  Not only does she provide unsolicited advice about our clothing choices daily with a well-meaning "You're not wearing THAT, are you?", she also has been known to provide grooming advice to the family members.  She seems to be a Stacy London and a Carmindy all rolled into one.  She will readily tell each of us when we can use some moisturizer for our dry skin, and she lets me know when it's time for me to get my eyebrows (or moustache) waxed. (A quality that I am so very thankful for, let me tell you!)  Clearly, she should have her own TV show entitled, How to Makeover Your Mom and Dad

Paul has had a busy year with coaching and teaching and remodeling our home. Throughout his labors, the kids have learned such valuable lessons. Things like how to spend 3 1/2 hours to make one mitred crown moulding cut are such invaluable lessons.  Their vocabulary is so much more colorful with some of the new four letter words that they now know. Paul deserves all of the credit for that!

I, of course, have been my usual crazy self , but this year I (again) particularly focused on my health. For instance, I have single-handedly done my part to eradicate malnourishment by consuming vast quantities of Krispy Kremes and Dove Chocolates and ice cream for dinner. It is the least that I could do. I have also embraced my yelling self and the fact that I drive a van that has been mommed.  These facts have been delightfully freeing, I tell you.  Dee-light-full!   I have also worked diligently on my mental health. Writing blog posts about my everyday life (and how mornings suck . . .) has brought me to the conclusion that my life IS insane . . . but . . . so is everyone else's life.  This gives me  joy, and a warped sense of peace.

So, all in all, it has been a memorable and fun-filled year for our family!

Merry Christmas!


Annie and family


To my IRL friends and family that do bless us every year with an actual, honest-to-goodness, Christmas letter, I mean you no offense. My anti-letter is just poking a bit of fun, because I have never been able to see myself writing one of those my kid is on the honor roll kind of letters. I guess I am just a bit too warped, or my family is. Whatever. Forgive me! And, Merry Christmas! - Annie


  1. I laughed so hard I have tears. Your letter is perfect. It is honest and shows the warmth and love of your family. I am going to let this inspire me to write a less "perfect family picture" type letter this year.

    Happy Holidays!

  2. What a neat Christmas letter! That's how it really is in most households, too. How come we never get letters from the folks whose kids have just been given life without parole, et? Enjoy your holidays and thanks for sharing this truly unique and wonderful letter!

  3. I love this letter! And I'd be right there with you on the consuming of the ice cream:)
    Stopped by from SITS to say hi.

  4. Loved this Annie, it was great! BTW... I understand the mitre-ing personally. I just got done doing that, and when Brian came to visit he noticed my moulding job. He said, "Why didn't you finish the corners?"
    How nice of him to notice.
    Have a most wonderful Christmas with your family.

  5. I didn't know how to put my name (profile) to post it. This is Diana Wilson in Phoenix.

  6. Love it! And just so you don't feel alone...I too am a yelling mom lol, I have decided that it really is the prime mode of communication! Great post! Honest, funny and peppered with little shockers :) Hope you have a very merry Christmas!


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