Not Me! June 8th

Are you ready?

I am.

My last week has been pretty crazy, what with doctor's visits, bouncing checks, and a kitty's trip to heaven.  Needless to say, I am more than ready to divulge all of my week's insanity.  And, if it doesn't make me feel better, at least it will provide a little comic relief.  

On to Not Me! Monday for June 8 . . .

It was not me that had to run after El twenty seven times last Tuesday at E's tee-ball game.  I would have realized that a spirited 19 month old and a baseball field do not mix.  I would have also realized that upon seeing E man 2nd base and then wave, El would have immediately started screeching "Da-den!  Da -den!" and then she would have ran for her dear brother Ethan (Da-den).  Apparently, I would have figured out that El is a budding baseball player as she hugged the bag and threw a tantrum in front of two teams and their parents.  

It also couldn't have been me that sprinted out to rescue E from hurricane El, and in the midst of my sprint, peed my pants a little bit.  That would never happen to me!  I  would still have a bladder of steel even after three 50 pound pregnancy weight gains and delivering several 9 pound babies.

I am also still not wearing a safety pinned bra.

Ridiculous!

It was also not me that felt very thankful for graduation parties yesterday.  I would have felt thankful and proud of the graduate's accomplishments instead of lucky that the family scored a free bbq meal that I did not have to cook.  That would have been very ungrateful of me!  So clearly, it was not me!

And when dear Sammy went to heaven, and hubby and I were calming down after blubbering over him for many minutes, it was not me that laughed hysterically when hubby remarked with a bit of relief, "At least I don't have to clean up cat litter anymore!"  I would have respected Sammy's untimely death and remained composed instead of hooting and hollering with laughs.

I also would not have lost control of my bladder, again, while laughing.  

And if I did,  I would not have laughed harder, thereby subsequently leaking more pee.                        

Silly!  Who leaks pee as an adult? Obviously, not me. 

I couldn't afford another person in diapers.