Wouldn't life be nice if we could employ the do over more often?
Alas . . . I digress.
Onto my therapy . . .
It was not me that burned the garlic bread at dinner last night. Clearly, I would have used a timer after burning approximately 4,792 other loaves of garlic bread. I would also have not turned the broiler on HIGH instead of the gentler, less likely to burn, LOW setting. Nope! Not Me! It was also not me that was applauded by my family for my uninterrupted run of burning the bread record. Ridiculous! Who applauds burnt bread while the smoke alarm is wailing in the background? Not me!
It also was not me that decided to wear a tanktop sports bra to the gym the other day to show off my beginning-to-be-sculpted shoulders. I would never be so vain! It could not have been me that when taking my weights class at the gym that day did an overhead press and noticed that while my shoulders were looking better each day, I had forgotten to shave my underarms in the shower that morning. Clearly, I would have remembered such an important task and I would never have exposed my fellow exercisers to the forest that was growing in my pits. I am more polite than that!
I most certainly did not ignore the smelly diaper aroma emanating from El's little bottom after realizing that my hubby would be home in five minutes and that he could change her. I would never postpone a diaper change and risk a rash on my baby's cute little bottom, because I just couldn't stand the thought of one more poopy mess. That would be so very selfish and un-mom like for me to do. It couldn't have been me!
It was also not me that decided to clean out the back of my van and then left the trunk open for the entire evening, and the entire neighborhood to view. I clearly have enough space in my brain to remember to close the van door after I was done cleaning it. Therefore, it could not have been me! Silly!
Finally, it was also not me that blamed the kiddies for the said door when my nice neighbor came by to let me know it was still opened at 10 PM. I would have taken full responsibility for my actions!
There!
Much better!
And now to begin my do over for this week. . .
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