Not Me! June 15th

It is Not Me! Monday . . . 

and . . .

so far so good.

After getting up at 7 am I have already had my coffee (with cereal, but I did think about my beloved Krispy Kremes), cleaned the kitchen, worked out at the gym, made the kiddies breakfast and lunch, and brainstormed with the kiddies about our A-Z summer (more about that later).

I have been quite productive today, much to my surprise.  And, I am wondering if it is because hubby went in to work today?

Hmm.

Anyway, with so much done already and the day looming before me, I actually have a moment to divulge my last week's craziness in order to start this week refreshed, renewed, and reasonably sane.  Onto the craziness . . .

It was not me last Wednesday that walked around for the better part of the day with a spot of guacamole on my favorite teal T shirt.  I would have realized that I had spilled the guacamole while I was shoveling it in my mouth during lunch. (A move that I have perfected in order to keep E from devouring the entire bowl before anyone else can eat!)  I would have glanced at myself in the mirror at least once during the afternoon, so that I would have found that the green stain was displayed proudly on my left nipple region.  It was not me that then wondered what exactly the banker, the grocery clerk, and the gas station attendant thought of the said green nipple stain.  I wouldn't worry about such things!

It was also not me that grabbed my teal t-shirt this morning to wear to the gym, forgetting that the guacamole stain did not come out in the laundry.  It was also not me that was horrified when I spied my green nipple in the gym's numerous mirrors.  Ridiculous!

It is still not me that is  wearing the offensive shirt.

It was also not me last week that attempted to quiet a melting down El at the grocery store with a cookie, a cracker, and then a sandy and crumby piece of candy from I don't know when (or where for that matter)  located at the bottom of the abyss that is my purse.  I would never resort to bribery!  Never!  Clearly, it could not have been me that hoisted a screaming and wriggling El up and over my shoulder, left my grocery cart, and ran out the store's door when the bribery did not work.  That would be just silly!

It was not me that considered never shopping at the above grocery store again.

Finally, it was not me that trashed one of hubby's shirts when I discovered that something in the dryer had melted onto it.  I would never have rationalized that since hubby has approximately 217 other shirts to choose from that he would not miss that particular one.  Nope! Not me!  I would take the time to check every pocket of every pant leg that makes it into my washer and dryer.

Isn't that what everyone does? Every time?

Happy Monday!