Forgive me friends.
I do not have any funny stories to recount.
Or, any sassy observations to convey.
My heart is heavy today.
I just heard the news that a favorite uncle of mine has been diagnosed with liver cancer, and truthfully, I feel like I am under water and gasping for a breath. You see, 8 years ago, hubs' mom was diagnosed with the same cancer. At that time, I was younger, and more naive, and I didn't realize the gravity of a liver cancer diagnosis. Even though it happened right in front of my eyes, I refused to see mom waste away with increasingly toxic doses of chemotherapy. I was helped along in my denial by mom, of course. You see, she was so very brave, and never once did she complain outright of pain or sickness. Oh, she got a little cranky and even a bit spunkier than her normal self, but, she never complained about the cancer. She was the ultimate mom, after all. Worried about her kids and their feelings. Selfless to the end.
But now that I am older, I see the seriousness of a liver cancer diagnoses, and it makes me feel like I have been punched in the stomach. Hard.
I am tired.
And, most of all, I want to reach out and hug my dad, my cousins, and my whole family.
Since they are far from me, I will hug my own little ones just a little bit closer. I will drink in their delicious vitality, and I will appeciate their warm smiles and mischievious laughs. They heal the hurts.
Most of all, though, I pray.