When Is the Right Time to Spill My Secrets?

When is the right time to tell your kids about who you really are?

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Don't get me wrong.  My kiddies know me.  They know me well.

But, their image of me is tied to mothering.  I am mom.  I am the one that kisses their skinned knees.  I am the one that gets whacked out about pig sty-like bedrooms.   I am the one that is the Wii dance champion.

I am their mom.

They see me as their blankie.  Their go-to girl when things get tough.  Their supporter and cheerleader and pride bursting braggart.

They see me as mom.

But, often, I wonder, when will they see me as Annie?  When will they understand that I was a full and complete person before I ever considered becoming their mother?

I don't have the answers.

And, right now, I would say that my kids know the basics.  I am honest with them. If they have a question about me, I will answer it.  They know that I was a good student and that I stayed out of trouble.  They know that I was active in school activities, that I was a color guard band geek, that I dated different boys.  They know that I worked as a summer camp counselor, as a life guard, as a bra sales girl at Victoria's Secret.  I regale them with tales from these jobs and from my others as trainer and aerobics instructor and eventually as teacher.  I share funny stories about my college years and the craziness that I encountered.

They know the basics.

But, when is the right time to share that one of my high school boyfriends was crazy, came to my school to confront me about our breakup, and physically restrained me until teachers intervened?  When is the right time to share that despite being highly involved in lots of school activities, there were times that I felt desperately alone?  When is the right time to share that I experienced the "mean girls" in full force?  That I was bullied?  When is the right time to share about my stupid mistakes in college with friends?  With alcohol?  With schoolwork?  When is the right time to share about my first failed marriage? About my ex? About how I think that my divorce was one of the best things that has ever happened to me?

When?

It is a fine line.

On one hand, I do not want to lie to them or withhold information.  On the other hand, I am their mother.  I know them.  I want to protect them.  I know that right now, they are not old enough or mature enough to handle the information.  But, time has a way of speeding by, like the scenery out the window from the backseat of a car, and I know that sooner, rather than later, the "right" time will arrive. 

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It will be time for them to meet Annie, a different Annie than they know.

I hope I am ready.

Am I a Twit for Not Tweeting ?

Shhhh!

I have a secret.

Ready?

I don't tweet!

And, I am not really sure why I don't tweet, to tell you the truth.  Lord knows I could use some help when my 3 year old is stripping naked at Lowe's (see my last post) or when I am asked to come up with a team name for our trivia team (Team Crouching Woman, Hidden Cucumber must retire!)

Clearly, at the very least, I could use some cyber support.

So,  am I a twit for not tweeting?

Any advice for a virgin tweeter??

What Do You Say When . . .

What do you say when . . .


-your six year old son says, "WOW mom!  My penis is sooooooo big right now."?

- you discover that your three year old has a secret hiding place under the dining room table where she has hidden her babies, your cell phone, and an old banana?

-you discover that said hiding place is also where your 3 year old goes to pick her nose in "pwi- vate."?



What do you say when . . .

-you are looking for your favorite pair of tweezers and your nine year old daughter remarks, "Yeah mom.  I was going to tell you that you needed to tweeze."?

-your three year old declares, "No panties!  I don't like panties!!"?

-your husband explains, "I thought that I would help with the laundry.  I put a load of my sweatshirts in the wash . . . on delicate."? 



And finally . . .


What do you say when . . .

-you discover that your team name at the local watering hole's trivia night is Crouching Woman, Hidden Cucumber?   (Stop laughing!  I am not making this stuff up, and it gets worse.)

- you find out that you have been selected to represent team Crouching Woman, Hidden Cucumber in a trivia game musical tie in front of the entire population of the watering hole?

-the trivia game's emcee asks, "Are you THE Crouching Woman, Hidden Cucumber?"  (See.  I told you.)



Yeah.

I am speechless too.