Winning Isn't Everything

There are times when I think that I am married to the most competitive man alive.

This is not a new revelation for me. I see his penchant for competition almost daily. On our weekly dates, we often go to a local hangout for wings (his favorite), a beer, and a trivia game. We agonize over questions like, "What do a movie, a car and a tuxedo have in common?" And we are uncommonly tickled when we are the only team to figure out the answer . . . they can all be rented.

So, no, I am not surprised at hubby's love to compete. I hear him start his trash talk at dinner each night with the two older kiddies. He starts with something like, "Are you ready tonight? Are you ready for Dad to kick your butt in Wii Mario Kart?" The kids giggle and trash talk right back, and after dinner clean up, they head down to the basement for the tournament. Once there, I can hear their voices waft up through the air vents, and I smile at how much they too enjoy competition.

Heck, hubby loves competition. I know this. Why else would he love coaching so much? In my estimation, even though he can no longer go long for a pass or even post-up under the basket, he can still be a competitor when he coaches. I get this.

That's why when the family saw the sign on the boardwalk for free pizza, I should not have been surprised when Paul's interest was piqued. The sign read, "Three Brothers Pizza . . . Eat a whole pizza in 15 minutes and win 100 pizzas." Hubby looked over at me, smiled, and I knew. He actually thought that he could do it! Hubby was seriously  considering eating an entire pizza to win . . . more pizza.

"Annie, what do you think?"

Playing dumb I answered, "What do I think about what?"

"You know,"  he replied.  "The contest.  I think that I could do it."

Not wanting to burst his prideful bubble I answered, "Well, I have seen you eat a whole Domino's pizza before, so . . ."  I trailed off in thought, but he jumped right in.

"I know. I know," he said excitedly.  "And look, if I eat it in one hour, I can still get 10 free pizzas!"

An hour definitely sounded much more reasonable to me, but my more pressing thought was about how we would utilize and eat 10 free pizzas when we lived more than 3 states away.  I should have realized that hubby was not in it for the prize.  I quickly learned that he was in it for the bragging rights when he trotted back to me after speaking with the owner and stated, "Only 4 people out of 3500 have done it!"

This would have scared me away.  That and the sight of the Three Brothers large pizza that measured 26 inches in diameter.  It was one monster pizza.  No measly Domino's special here! Hubby was undaunted, however, and later that week he did it.  

He entered the contest.

According to him, the first two slices were delicious and went down in less than 8 minutes.

The second two went a bit slower but still were consumed at a good pace.

The third two went down . . .

with some difficulty . . .

and then . . .

to put it politely . . .

tried to make their way back up.

Hubby fought valiantly and kept those pesky slices down, but it was over. He could not take another bite.

No free pizzas.

When I asked him if he regretted entering the competition, he looked at me incredulously and said, "Nope!  I gave it my best shot, I'll get my picture on the wall, and I now know that I never want to enter another pizza eating contest again."

Well said.

I figured that he had learned his lesson.

I was wrong.  

Two nights later hubby and my brother-in-law ordered all-u-can-eat crab legs.  My brother-in-law ate 4 rounds.  Paul ate six.

At least he left vacation on a win.